it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
i think im in europe. pls send help
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