you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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