is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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