How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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