just come out here and I will go home with you...
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
handjob tips. give me some.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Randomize
