awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize