That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
