I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
