How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
