My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Randomize