so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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