Already got asked if we're dating
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
