He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
