I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
