My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
No...this little piggys going to the bar
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize