"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
