I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
