PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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