If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Randomize
