So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
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