I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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