I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
