its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
is this the sara with the beer cane?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
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