Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
He felt like a one man threesome
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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