hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
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