i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
