hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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