What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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