Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize