that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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