Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
