Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Randomize