OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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