How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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