Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
