At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
