Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
