God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
