that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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