You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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