I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
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