Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
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