dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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