I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
