Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Randomize
