Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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