I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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