it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
