I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
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