um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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